A Recipe You Might Need this Season

Recipe for baking Christmas Cookies With Kids

1. Turn on Christmas music.
2. Make yourself a hot, steaming cup of tea.  (Or pour yourself a glass of wine!!!)
3. Sprinkle a little flour on the floor.  Now you won't get upset when the kids spill, because someone is going to be sweeping anyway.
4. Take a few sips of your drink.  Smile.  
5. Let the kids measure and mix.  Don't bother about getting exact measurements.  Just make sure you get the sugar in there, we want nice, sweet cookies.  
6. Turn up the Christmas music.  Dance around the kitchen a bit.
7. Help the kids roll out the dough.
8. Give the kids the cookie cutters.  Sit down and enjoy that beverage you've been sipping on.
9. Wink and smile at the kids.  Tell them what a great job they're doing.
10. Share the yummy cookies with the mailman, the neighbors, and the rest of the family.

We baked gingerbread men yesterday, and it was kind of magical.  Not because there was sentimental Christmas carols playing in the background (although there was), or because we were baking in an idyllic kitchen with snowflakes gently falling outside the window (unfortunately, no).

It was magical because I finally learned the secret of how to make baking with kids fun.  It took me long enough.  :) I know that most of you learned this secret loooooong before I did.  You probably even tried to teach me the secret.  I wish it would have sunk in sooner.

But I've seen the light.  Here's the secret:  Let the kids go for it, and stop controlling everything!

And this secret, of course, applies to many areas of parenting, not just baking.  Let go and let them create and learn, and forget about the mess.  I know, I know, you're telling yourself, "That's her secret?"

It really was hidden from me for many years.  As the daughter of a perfectionist, it was ingrained into the fabric of who I was at birth.  I thought perfection was the goal.  Controlling all the details meant a better product.  Doing it for them meant it looked prettier.  Now I realize that happier kids makes a happier mom, and those are the end products we're looking for when we're talking about projects, and crafts, and setting the table, and making beds, and Christmas baking.  For Pete's sake, the cookies are just going to end up in our stomachs anyway!   It has definitely been a journey for me to slow down and relax and stop controlling all the details.  The more I let go, the more fun I'm having, and the more fun my kids are having!  When I apply this principle to other areas of parenting as well, life is better.

It pretty much took having five kids to really, wholeheartedly embrace this magic.  Actually I am completely convinced that God gave me a surprise fifth baby because I was too hard headed to learn this lesson with only four kids, and He knew that this lesson was crucial for me to learn.  I was still able to cling white knuckled to my perfectionism, even though it was running me ragged.  I was still able to require perfectionism for myself - starting at sun up, and not stopping till well after sun down to ensure everything was done to my standard.  But five kids is just too many to maintain the standard.  Something's gotta give.

 The thing is, perfectionists don't just require perfection from themselves, they expect and require perfectionism from those around them, even if they don't admit it.  And this was why God knew I needed a Seminary Surprise.

When I fall back into my old ways, feel free to remind me of the magic.